


i wish for my broken heart

by hannarin



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Hurt, Hurt No Comfort, Longing, M/M, Pining, Repressed Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-19
Updated: 2020-10-19
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:20:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27096427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hannarin/pseuds/hannarin
Summary: He wishes.He wishes.He wishes.But he never takes action.(inspired by "is your bedroom ceiling bored" by cavetown)
Relationships: Kozume Kenma & Kuroo Tetsurou, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 2
Kudos: 19





	i wish for my broken heart

**Author's Note:**

> super short read!! enjoy (or don't since this is angst)

He wishes that he told him how he felt. He wishes his heart didn’t hurt.  He wishes that he wouldn’t avoid Kuroo.

That’s the problem. Kenma has too many wishes.    
  
Kenma wishes he could turn those wishes into a reality.   
  
But he can’t. He doesn’t have the courage.   
  
Kenma wishes he had more courage. Kenma wishes that he’d fall in love with someone who wasn’t his best friend. Kenma wishes he could call Kuroo. Kenma wishes he wasn’t alone.    
  
He types out “ _I love you,_ ” before erasing it. His fingers hover over the “call” button. He shuts off his phone. 

Kenma stretches his hands up to the stars on his ceiling and thinks. 

Kenma wishes he could see Kuroo again.

Well, he could. He could get up, and take the train to Kuroo’s university and say hello. He could pull him aside and tell Kuroo that he loves him. He could do that.    
  
His hands flop back above his head.   
  
Kenma wishes that Kuroo knew just how much he loves him. Kenma wishes that he didn’t love so hard. Kenma wishes he could give him a million little kisses.

What would he give up to have Kuroo run his hands through Kenma’s hair? To hear his teasing voice? What would he give up to have his hands tangle against his best friends? To feel those lips against his? What would he give up?   
  
Kenma doesn’t know. He wishes he does.   
  
He feels left behind.    
  
Kenma wishes that he hadn’t avoided him then. Kenma wishes that Kuroo would talk to him again. Kenma wishes that even if Kuroo did talk to him again, that Kenma wouldn’t desert him. He wishes he didn’t have so much self-control. He wishes that he was more impulsive. He wishes that he’d held his hand longer. He wishes he’d kissed him just once. He wishes he said “I love you.”   
  
But all he does is say it to his ceiling instead. He tells the moon. He tells the sun.    
  
Kenma never tells Kuroo.   
  
His jaw begins to hurt. Hot, angry tears stream down his face.   
  
He’s angry that he loves Kuroo. He’s angry that Kuroo left him behind. He’s angry that he won’t do anything about it. He’s angry. 

Kenma wishes for Kuroo.

And so, he tumbles out of bed, opens a drawer, and picks out a scrap of paper. On it, he writes three words.    
  
_ I love you. _   
  
Then, he adds it to the box. The one that contains hundreds of slips of paper for every time he’s done this. How many times he’s wanted to tell Kuroo he loves him. He sticks his hand into the box instead, like he’s done a thousand times before. Running his fingers through the papers, watching them dance between his fingers. He imagines how it would feel to throw handfuls of them into the air. How it would feel to let them scatter into the wind. 

He imagines.

But he never does it.   
  
He wishes.

He wishes.   
  
He wishes.   
  
But he never takes action.   
  
Because when everything settles, Kenma is still a lonely coward with a broken heart.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm sorry if i broke your heart :((


End file.
